This years Sage Summit is being held in Chicago (July 25th -28th). CRM Together will be represented there by Marc, Majella and Ralph.
And to celebrate this we have our survival guide. This is great if its your first time at a conference or need reminding of their realities.
- Prepare – to spoof (=to tell soft fluffy white lies) your way for 3-4 days. Of the 1000’s going all will tell you they are doing great and you should too even if you are not or just doing okay. Look smug and too busy to get into details on how well you are doing. Look at your phone and blame it for its constant need for attention. If you are really doing great then make yourself feel better by thinking that everyone else is spoofing.
- Choose your seats strategically – you never know when you might have to leave a seminar. Also practice your apology (wave at the speaker and voice ‘sorry’ then point to your phone blaming it from taking you from this most amazing seminar).
- Food – have a colleague or someone who told you they were doing great taste the food at the conference center first. If they start wheezing or come up with a rash say you are not hungry and use your phone to order from outside (after calling an ambulance if needed first – you decide).
- Drink – Know your limits but insist to others that they should ignore theirs. This will lead them to drunkenly embarrass themselves and forever feel obliged to you. Use your phone to record any actions that may be used for blackmail.
- Boast – about the 10k you do every morning followed by an hour of yoga. This makes others feel bad about themselves and want to be like you. At the end of the conference you should have a small following.
These should give you the basics on how to survive (and thrive at) Sage Summit 2016
If you enjoyed this and would like to connect at summit please get in touch.
Sage Summit 2016 site: http://www.sage.com/sage-summit